Freedom

That's not the title that I would have originally picked for a post about my MCAT scores.  But I can honestly say that this is the only word that is resonating in my mind.

Freedom.

Freedom from pressure.
Freedom to really follow God's plan.
Freedom to discover God's purpose in my life.
Freedom to see how His plan is going to play out.
Freedom from worry.

All day long (and really for the last month since I took the test), I've been wondering how I would react one way or another.  I decided it wouldn't matter either way.  If the scores were perfect, AWESOME!  But if the other outcome was a reality with scores lower than average, then I know that God was still faithful through the process of studying and preparing for this test.  I know that this process has been me living His Will.

How do I know that?  The proof that I'm not completely devastated with my lower-than-average score of 24O.  I want it to be a testament to how He has carried me through some of the toughest times in my entire life to get me in a place where I will continue to praise Him regardless of outcomes.

So, I have freedom.  I have peace. I have excitement to look forward in fulfillment of whatever God's plans might be for my life.  And I have faith, a stronger faith and belief in the King who gave me life than I've ever had before in my life.

Praise be to Him.  Because let's just be honest, I've done absolutely nothing in my lifetime to be worthy of the blessings He has bestowed upon my life.

I said that I would praise Him regardless of the outcome, and I can think of doing nothing else!

[MCAT scores are on a scale from 0-45, with 30 (my goal) being considered a good score to be accepted into medical school. The letter "O" after the numbers is my writing score.]

german chocolate amazingness

Today was relatively uneventful.  I spent the morning and part of the afternoon reading A Lineage of Grace by Francine Rivers.  It was good to have down-time and read this morning about Tamar.  At the end of the chapter, there are some really good discussion questions.  Since I was supposed to be "working", I didn't spend the reflection time I need to fully grasp some of the contents.  I then moved onto Rahab.  Through reading about these women in Christ's lineage, I am amazed at how we (read I) try to be so perfect and put on this face of how we (read I) have it all together.

Reality check: both Tamar and Rahab didn't know God, but knew of Him.  When they had started to follow Him, it was more of a feeling of accepting that He has to be the true God.  These Canaanite women didn't follow the pagan gods their families and friends did...they knew better.  These women are not perfect.  Tamar had to dress like a temple prostitute to seduce her late husband's father, Judah, in order to have a right to an heir that he had previously refused her through abandonment.  Rahab was taken the temple when she was a young girl for the pleasures of the king.  When the king grew tired of her, she had no other choice but to make a life of prostitution for herself.  She hides the Israelite spies from the guards and king...and helps the Israelites defeat Jericho and claim the land God had given them.

Prostitution. Seduction.

But they kept their faith.

These women had faith in something that they couldn't be sure of, but somehow knew it had to be truth.  Through all of their different hardships, they looked to an unseen God for help.  They didn't know this God well, but yet their willingness to serve an unseen God created righteousness in their lives.

God has used sinners all throughout time.  He had women like Tamar and Rahab in the lineage of Christ.  Jesus hung out with tax collectors. And then there's me - a sinner saved by grace.  Oh, how I don't even deserve it!

---Awkward Transition---

I was able to read all morning...and that was great.  I got to help some students create resumes this afternoon.  That is something that I enjoy - teaching.  Hmmm.  Interesting.  That might be another blog post to come soon.  Crazy stuff.  Anywho, I went to dinner with my boss and another lady who came up to help the Academy from TTI.  After dinner, my boss and I made our way to a local custard joint.  I had specifically saved room for this and definitely didn't overdo it at dinner for that reason.  For those of you familiar with CS, this place had way more selection than Shake's.  And, I'm pretty sure that it tasted better too.  Sorry, just being honest here.

My German chocolate concrete: chocolate custard with butterscotch, coconut, and pecans.  

I probably shouldn't have wasted the calories on this dessert.  So I'll just claim that I'm on vacation and it doesn't count.  Yup, I just did that.  

Tomorrow is the last day of the last session of the TCCA, the project for which I was hired to assist.  It's crazy how fast time has gone by.  It's already the end-ish of February...and April is approaching quickly.  It's definitely time to get serious about job searching again.  I have been, but I really need to hunker down, revise the resume, and network all over again.  My time at TTI is coming to a close.  And I'm not thinking I'm going to miss it.  More on this dilemma later...

Have a happy friday, all!